Thursday, September 1, 2016

EBB TIDE


Ready or not
Today is September first. Therefore the
obvious question of the day is "where
did summer go?" Well in reality my dear
friends it's still here and strong. For most
easterners, key holidays and the school
calendar drove our perception of when
summer began and ended. Monday is
Labor Day which in Manhattan always
drove the lemmings back home from the
Hamptons or Nantucket. Soon thereafter
the social season begins. And don't forget
that Fashion Week starts bright and early
on Wednesday, September eighth!
Weather or not
However... the fact is that summer doesn't
end until September twenty first. Hence
while we've historically been prohibited
from wearing white post Labor Day, it's
wise to abstain from donning autumnal
togs until mid to late October. Not only
does one easily become a sodden sight,
it's virtually impossible to compete with
those tan young things bopping around
town. And while I don't want to hide in
the shadows -  why ignore reality while
sweating like a porcine fashion plate?
Show a little restraint - patience please!
Seasonal disorder
Since the beginning time the fashion
cycle has been out of sync with what
is really happening out there. Little
is as frustrating as slogging through
ninety degree temperatures and high
humidity to find nothing to wear at
a shop. While in Italy one October -
there wasn't a single thing to buy in
any of the stores - everything being
hot, heavy, and unsaleable. Add the
specter of global warming and it's
time to stop sweating the small stuff
and redefine "fall" fashion ASAP!
More or less
As a gentleman of somewhat substantial
proportions, theres nothing I like better
than layers. Yet whether such subterfuge
actually camouflages one's sins is at best
questionable. However somehow having
more over my mess makes me feel safe
and sound. However given I'm the king
of hot flashes, I can't even fathom wearing
much more than a polo and sport coat until
sometime late in October. Therefore while
Uniqlo's shelves may be stacked to the hilt
with cashmere, I'm keeping my cool while
it's still hot out there. Why tempt fate?!
Neither here nor there
September is a time of limbo. In essence
a seasonal purgatory. Much of America
is so done with summer that any spark
can ignite it's dusty, dry demeanor. The
result being fires raging across the west
that destroy homes and happiness. Here
in central Montana we've been lucky to
date. However we're at times trapped in
a smoky haze that makes breathing a bit
tougher than usual. Theres no doubt that
any day now we will get a frost. However
post such brief trauma the weather here
will be glorious through all of October.
Chill pill
Frankly, this is my favorite time of the year.
However hay fever challenges my ability to
fully enjoy this transitional month. Heavily
medicated, it's best that I stay inside until
after the first hard frost kills everything -
especially rag weed. If I do venture out, it
must be with my tried and true companion -
a tissue box.  Seasonal challenges aside,
we must smell the roses while we may.
Before we know it snow will be upon the
ground. And quickly thereafter we'll yearn
for spring. You see, we always want what
we don't have. Don't we?