Friday, August 15, 2014


Where am I?
I seem to be losing it. Actually not
just "it" but all sorts of things. In my
prior life I was surrounded by smart
people who I relied on. Hence they
made sure I did all that they needed
me to! Now I'm pretty much on my
own. Frank considers me an adult
and treats me as such. To date I'm
still struggling with organizing my
organizational skills. Actually, I'm
quite organized. My challenge is
actually remembering to do all the
things I've organized. I'm a mess.
Full house
Up to this point my retirement has
been a frenzy of renovation activity.
Transforming a house requires an
army of experts in/out all day long.
For many reasons these folks need
answers. Therefore much of my day
is dedicated to making decisions as
needed. Such spontaneity can be a
bit distracting. Ultimately things get
done and that's because I don't do
any actual work, just help the boys
get it done. Keeping focused is my
greatest challenge, I get distracted!
Techno phobe?
It seems that I'm a man of extremes.
Rather than adhere to prior habits
that were actually quite effective,
I've opted to shift cold turkey to
irresponsibility. The very idea of
keeping a calendar on my phone or
computer is offensive in every sense
of the word. Yet if I'm truly honest
with myself - I do need some form
of reminder, push, motivation, and
most important focus. Otherwise
I'm easily deterred and even more
easily apt to forget what's important.
Definitely off the list
Whether it kills me or not, I've had to
revert back to my tried and true habit
of making lists. Jotted on odd scraps
of paper, they're all over my office
ready to be checked off at any time.
If the entries are things I like to do,
their place on my list is momentary
at best. It's the tasks that I loathe that
seem to haunt me daily. Transitioning
requires filling out many change of
address forms. Now that one can do
it on-line, it's actually quite easy. But
not in every case. It's MURDER!
Address unknown
We subscribe to many magazines.
Most publishers provide on-line
tools to manage your subscriptions.
However in our computerized world,
any variation requires patience and
fortitude. For example, some sites
refuse to recognize our new address
claiming that said location doesn't
exist. Since I'm sitting on the spot
and have poured most of my life
savings into it, I'm certain they're
wrong. So once one hits an on-line
wall, it's time to pick up the phone.
Guilty as charged
Before I go any further with thoughts
about phones, I must apologize to all
of my Executive Assistants. You may
recall those times that I had you handle
my personal business via the telephone.
I had no idea that I was forcing you to
experience the equivalent of audible
water boarding. I'm so sorry! Now I've
learned that after dialing toll free one
is immersed into a virtual hell where
it's virtually impossible to speak to a
real person. When you do get through,
your hold time may be thirty minutes!
Major disconnect
Cruel is the only word that describes
the music one is forced to listen to as
you wait. What's even more torturous
is when the person one finally speaks
to can barely be understood. I'm not
provincial however trying to explain
mundane events in Lewistown to a
person in Pimpri-Chinchwad, India
simply doesn't work. I find it baffling
that the most simplest of questions
requires the patience of a saint and
at least two hours to accomplish.
Maybe I should go back to work!
Written on the wind
Given I prefer the written word, I often try
to search for an appropriate e-mail address
rather than attempt to chat across the globe.
Most websites bury such data deep within
making finding it very challenging. Sadly
once you finally reach out, automatic reply
informs you that it will take two to five
business days to receive an answer. More
often than not, said reply requires another
query and so on. It can take weeks and
who has the time? Either I've become the
village idot or our ability to communicate
has been seriously compromised. It blows!
Kick the bucket
Coming full circle back to lists, it now
seems that as soon as I've checked off
all the entries, new ones have already
been added. I thought my "retirement"
would be easier. However the task of
simply keeping up with life may be the
hardest job I've ever had. we're planning
to escape reality and take a vacation this
fall. Somehow the job of orchestrating a
journey is a pleasure rather than a chore.
From now on I'm keeping my Bucket List
on the top of the pile! Isn't that what our
golden years should be all about?!