Tuesday, January 5, 2016


Out of my mind
If I didn't know any better I would think
that I was totally going insane. While
I'd thought that nothing could be crazier
than the holidays, the past days have
been so overwhelming that they've put
me over the edge. Frankly, I'm not sure
why I'm losing it. Now as I sit poised
on the brink of an emotional precipice,
there's no doubt that I'm hanging on by
a thread. Is this any way to start the new
year? Has some El Nino gravital force
unleashed a tsunami that may ultimately
consume this struggling prince of tides?
Full circle
Last week my ever optimistic buddy
"A" reminded us that as of today -
Mercury is in retrograde once more.
For those astrologically challenged,
that means we're all totally screwed.
And while spending the next days
under the covers seems to be quite
a viable option, all that would do is
guarantee higher odds of suffocation.
Hence rather than hide we all must
face reality and hope we can keep
our heads above water. After all,
things have to get better... right?!
Left behind
Part of my problem is that I'm naturally
a compulsively consumed being. Thus
our halls were decked to the max this
holiday. Hence this weekend an entire
day was devoted to removing ghosts
of Christmas past. Rather than live in
a petrified forest, it all had to exit the
premises. However by the time our
exit strategy was complete, there was
a layer of pine needles in every nook
or cranny throughout the house. Which
means that sometime in July we'll still
be picking up Santa's bits and pieces.
Switching channels
The problem is that once the new year
begins, it's quickly followed by a bitch
slap of reality. Over the weekend I was
lulled into a sense that there was plenty
of time to waste. Only to be suddenly
jarred out of my haze early Monday
morning by a plethora of uncompleted
or deferred tasks now due. Suddenly
I regretted spending two nights binge
watching the newest season of Nurse
Jackie on Netflix. Or leisurely watching
the ruling class hash and bash during
the first episode of Downtown Abbey.
Much like some angry pagan deity
awakened from it's sleep, life has
returned to what most consider to
be a vengeance. We can no longer
defer blame for the errors of our
ways to seasonal stress disorder.
Within a wee we'll course correct.
But given that forces are beyond
our control, we must be prepared
to hitch a bumpy ride on the road
to normality. If we're losing hope,
it's easy to understand given what
is on the news every night. Scary!
Escape route
So we must buckle down, chill out, and
embrace what comes our way. There's
no doubt that we'll weather this deluge
By February most of you will be bored
out of your minds and ready for any/all
escape. Therefore whenever any of us
feel the need to run away, we must start
planning some journey. Warm climate?
Ski vacation? Cruise around the world?
One thing is advisable, plan something
that's totally self indulgent. After all,
you deserve to live your dream rather
than in a nightmare! BON VOYAGE!