Tuesday, June 30, 2015

SELF SERVICE


Something's fishy
Living in a rather isolated locale, it's
easy to be rather critical. While I'm
the first to shake my pom poms for
Lewistown,  said small pond can at
times seem somewhat limiting to a
former big fish. Thus I'll admit that
I can be more than a tad critical upon
occasion. While we're blessed to have
one establishment that serves it up
pretty damned well, the balance are
mediocre at best. How far must one
travel in order to experience a decent
meal? Are we out of service?!

Disconnected
The other night we took our neighbors
out for dinner. Having heard of some
changes at our local hotel's restaurant -
we all thought we'd give it one more
try. We opted to dine in the bar which
was probably our second mistake post
going there. Long story short - once
again I had to teach the bartender how
to mix my Manhattan, beg for menus,
ask for silverware, and dine upon a
sticky surface. Sadly, the only thing
that was done well was the burger
that I had ordered RARE.

Neither here nor there
Obviously it wasn't our most shining
moment. Given Lewistonians are if
nothing else a captive audience, we
have come to expect less rather than
more when it comes to ambiance.
However I recently took a trip to a
rather large midwestern metropolis
only to discover the grass is NOT
always greener elsewhere. Shortly
after checking into a fabulously new
and modern downtown hotel, I went
down to the bar. After grabbing my
stool I sat and patiently waited...

Bare essentials
Finally somebody offered me a drink
and after two requests... a menu. My
cocktail was plopped before me sans
napkin or coaster. Bravely I sipped
then waved at the barkeep multiple
times before finally ordering dinner.
Historic precedence would suggest
that post taking my order a placemat,
silverware, and water glass would
magically appear. Apparently Merlin
was off for the night given my dinner
arrived without proper weapons of
destruction. Every man for himself!

Basic instinct
So what was the difference between
here and there? NADA. At about
sixteen hundred miles apart - both
eateries paid me a disservice which
I in return had to pay for. Proof that
my gaps in service had little to do
with where I was. Rather, it may be
proof of the end of civilization. The
fact is I didn't ask for much beyond
the basics. Yet apparently providing
flatware and serviettes are beyond
the scope of the modern "hospitality"
industry no matter where one lives.

On the job training
Why are we willing to pay more for
less? Back at the bar, a gent sitting
a few stools down literally had it.
He quietly suggested our bartender
pursue a new career given he was
obviously incapable of executing
his job description. He coached
our bar boy on basic table waiting.
And while young man nodded, he
subsequently returned to the error
of his ways. Later on I overheard
him grumbling about poor tips.
Enough of this foolishness!

Gift with purchase
Here's a tip for all of you wayward
servers. One must properly dish it
out in order for customers to open
up their wallets. Going through the
motions doesn't guarantee fifteen
percent. A tip is extra recognition
of a job well done. Indication that
you went above and beyond basic
standards of service. So if you want
more... give more. Being proud of
what you do is the best way to earn
respect. And if you get a little cash
along the way... all the better!

Monday, June 29, 2015

GET OVER IT


Rainbow's end
The past days my Facebook page has
been lit up by rainbow bright images
of my friends. The amazing level of
support post for our Supreme Court's
decision to finally end Gay marriage
discrimination has been amazing. For
at least one night even the White House
was a rainbow. However at the end of
said rainbow does not lie a pot of gold.
Rather it's a cluster of bitter bigots who
are angrier than heck. You see, not only
are they disenfranchised - they're scared.
Hence... so am I. And... so should you.
Kiss off
What are they actually afraid of?
The fact is I now love Frank just as
much (if not more) than I did the
day before said decision was law.
Living together for twenty years
meant sharing everything. Hence
we've every intention of doing so
till death do us part. The only thing
that changed is we can now legally
enjoy all of the financial benefits
and protections of marital bliss.
So what are all of these paunchy
old white guys so threatened by?
Members only
The LGBT community has no hidden
agenda beyond equality. What you do
in your bedroom is no business of ours.
The difference is that now we can't be
punished for being who we are. You've
every right to believe in whatever you
choose to believe. Yet you don't have
the right to prohibit me from my right
to be your equal. Religion is much like
a Country Club. One gains membership
by agreeing to play by the rules. And
if you break said rules... you're OUT.
Thus "morality" is a matter of opinion.

What's done is done
Almost a year ago, anyone openly Gay
and Catholic in Lewistown Montana
was spurned by our priest and parish.
We moved on because we truly had no
choice. As former friends and fellow
parishioners reminded us at a public
meeting with our Bishop - "the rules
are the rules". Therefore given our
"lifestyle" didn't fit their Catechismal
context we were literally forced out.
Was that fair? NO. Did it hurt? YES.
Was it perfectly legal and hence their
religious right? ABSOLUTELY!
We the people
The United States Constitution gives us
all that right. And in my opinion - what
could be more American than that? You
see, each of us chooses to believe what
we consider truth. For some said pursuit
of happiness includes snakes, abstaining
from medical treatment, or not eating
pork. Depending on your beliefs, you
have the right to worship the diety of
your choice. Be it Buddha, Abraham,
Jesus, Muhammad, or Lucifer. So help
me here... How does my being a gay
man threaten your religious freedom?
No body's business but yours
The fact is that no one's rights were
violated by this decision. Instead
now a minority of Americans who
were illegally prohibited from their
rights finally got what was coming
to them. Once again the American
way triumphed against prejudice.
In the end the only thing lost was
an unfair advantage. Hence while
few of us like to be on the losing
side, when it's over... it's over. Isn't
it time to embrace our differences
and celebrate our EQUALITY?
Move along
As long as neither side breaks the law -
nothing changes beyond who marries
who. So feel free to continue to snub
me at the grocer or giggle behind my
back. Or worse... piously bury your
dead in the Catholic cemetery behind
the beautiful new gates that Frank and
I helped pay for. While being slighted
may not seem fair it actually is. That's
because you have a legal right to think
as you see fit. So please... stop all of
this foolishness and get over yourself.
Most important, stay out of my way.

Sunday, June 28, 2015

7th Day Surprise: LOVE LOST


For the past two days I've been constantly crying.
Most of my tears are for joy given the recent news that 
LOVE IS LOVE
no matter who you love.

However, I've also shed a few tears
for those who have loved yet lost.
The generations upon generations of same sex lovers
who were never given the right to be 
EQUAL YET DIFFERENT.

And so today, I honor them.
True love never dies!