Gone hunting...

A matter of balance
In Montana there are three things that
are of upmost importance. They are
GOD, FAMILY, and HUNTING.
While some of us try to keep this trinity
in balance, others find it challenging after
they've secured a license to kill. Especially
on weekends, most of our local gentlemen
disappear out into the wild for a dose of
male bonding. Leaving their wives free to
bask in the glory of a house sans hubby.

Boom town
Hunting Season is one of the biggest
commercial phenomena in our local
economy. Hunters from all over fly
into our beloved state to track, shoot,
kill, and mount their prey. The fiscal
benefit beyond hunting licenses is
transportation, lodging, dining, meat
processing fees, and taxidermy. Plus
a few guns, bows, and ammo sold at
the Sports Center downtown (right).

Dressed to kill
Every fall it's rather fun to watch fully
outfitted Wall Street bears lumbering
through town. While many may look
dapper in a custom Brioni suits back
home, upon donning camouflage togs
most lose their urban panache. In fact,
the added padding atop amply padded
frames tends to cause them to amble
along Main Street with a gait that is
oddly akin to those soon to be smitten.

Male call
The other day I was gobsmacked
by a post card solicitation that I
received from the  Lewistown
First Christian Church. Given
I'm devout Catholic, this missive
must have been sent en masse to
"friends" within our 59457 zip.

No forwarding address
The postcard front pictured a vigilant hunter
scanning the horizon. With these words...

THE QUEST ON THURSDAY NIGHTS.
Church designed for hunting season
Church for those who love the outdoors
Church the way it ought to be

FREE GUN DRAWING
each week for five weeks.

The trap is set
I went to the church website.
Here's your link to QUEST. 
Given hunters hit the woods
every weekend during huntin'
season, Pastor Rick Page has
created a Thursday service for
those who like to kill (animals).

Loaded for bear
For this alternative form of celebration,
the church sanctuary is fully adorned
with vestiges and visages of prey past.
Including a large stuff black bear which
sits dead center on the altar. While the
God of the Old Testament demanded
that all graven images be thrown out,
apparently he has given First Christian
Church a reprieve. It seems that musty
pelts, skulls and horns are necessary to
attract the most elusive of prey... MEN.
And just in case that doesn't work there
is the added incentive of a FREE GUN.

Ready, aim, INSPIRE!
Yes dear friends, you read correctly.
Every Thursday evening during the
fall hunting season the Lewistown
First Christian Church will be holding
a drawing for a free gun. However,
let me be clear. In order to be eligible
for said drawing, one must attend the
ENTIRE Thursday QUEST service.
Apparently for some, their ultimate
quest is not the power of God. But
rather it seems to be free fire power.
Even in Montana, fact can be stranger
than fiction! HAPPY HUNTING!

What a circus...

Past due
For a time it seemed that my absolute
least favorite form of entertainment
had faded from cultural relevance.
As you may recall, I was the child
who loathed the circus whereas my
Dad enjoyed nothing more than an
annual visit to the Big Top. With the
exception of Cirque de Soleil, old
fashioned circuses have disappeared.
That is except in Washington DC.

The greatest show
It's obvious everyone has had
it with Washington. The shut
down has turned our hallowed
halls of government into a three
ring circus filled with the same
performers as any side show.

Clowns
While their attempts to entertain
can be at times be oddly charming,
overall I must admit that I find
clowns rather irritating. In theory
their purpose is to make us happy.
However the ensuing shenanigans,
grand standing, outrageous gags,
and other attempts to garner our
attention is tom foolery at best. It's
time they stop the fun and games.

Elephants
Public favor is worth more than
peanuts. In a recent NBC/WSJ
poll, 53% of Americans blamed
the government shutdown on
our GOP leadership. Whereas
31% blamed the President. With
a favorable rating of 24%, these
plodding pachyderms must soon
wake up or face extinction.

Acrobats
Our high fliers in Washington need
to provide the American people with
a safety net we can rely on. Nobody
wants to risk swinging through the
air without the reassurance that our
elected officials are spotting for us.
While I appreciate their facile ability
to maneuver as politics require, it's
time that they work on a new act to
stabilize our rather shaky economy.

Freaks
It seems that finally our
patience for deviants and
their shocking behavior
has weakened. One thing
is certain. Those with a
preference for TEA are
now deemed questionable
at best. While invitations
have been sent out, just
21% of Americans replied
favorably to the idea of tea
time. The balance stating
"not for all the tea in..."

Ring Leader
What about the man left standing in
the center ring? One must to agree
that he has firmly stood his ground.
His resolve has not been distracted by
the gyrations and roars that surround
him. He must maintain control or else
our political circus could dissolve
into an angry herd of wild beasts,
crazed zealots, misled officials, and
other types of totally evil vermin!

7th Day Surprise - Clearly odd

I am a product of the fifties.

Looking back, 

one has to marvel at the naivety of that era.

Anything new was considered amazing.

Technology and science 

were considered the ultimate 

manifestation of innovation.

And...  clearly... advertising...

was not regulated!