Tuesday, December 3, 2019

Climbing up the wrong tree...

Balsam Born
As a child we always had a fresh
tree. There's nothing like the feel
and scent of fragrant pine. Who
knew that "fresh" trees were cut
and shipped MONTHS prior to
being placed in one's abode. No
wonder they're dry even when
frequently hydrated. Recently
we've enjoyed a local tree that
was severed just a day before!
Faux Firs
Nothing is forever. At some point
my mother - the uber traditionalist
went faux. Not the ordinary pipe
cleaner variety, but one imported
from Italy with three tone needles
on hand thread wrapped branches.
No matter how "real" it appeared,
there was never enough balsam
scented spray, instance, or candles
in the world to replicate the eau
de vrai pin. So Ethel dragged her
flight of fancy to the curb in order
to switch back to the real thing.
Juniper Jitters
To be honest, I don't like Christmas
trees. My aversion is due to years
of running department store visual
departments. Decorating thousands
upon thousands of tannebaum was
all too tedious. Hence by the time
we finished (late October) the last
thing I wanted to do was go home
and put up my own. I couldn't do
it. Thus for many years... I didn't.
Needlessly Needled
For our first decade together my
beloved and I spent Christmas
apart. Only to reunite for a New
Year's gift exchange. We had no
need for a tree. That is until we
bought our condo in Lewistown.
And slowly our family traditions
merged (with my parents in tow).
Hence Frank and I merrily deck
our halls Whether I like it or not!
Prickly Pair
It's not easy. Frank bears the
brunt of responsibility for our
holiday foliage. Don't get me
wrong, I help select, cut down
or buy, erect, and decorate it.
However I bitch and moan all
through said process. And yet
somehow we get the job done.
Each year trying to par down
accoutrements in an effort to
avoid a sleigh load of drama.
Somehow by the 25th our yin
and yang yule looks quite jolly.
Tannenbaum Tempest
As holiday mania gains momentum
we are both dreaming of escaping to
some heathen haven. Two years ago
we were on a cruise far away from it
all. I'll admit that I loved jingling my
bells on a beach while I warmed my
toddy. However that's not going to
happen this annum. So once again
we will be climbing up the wrong
tree for Christmas.With all of the
trimmings. And start to save for the
gift that keeps on giving - a holiday
cruise in December 2020! Ho ho go!