Something worth celebrating

Two of a kind
Twenty years ago today Frank and
I first met. Back in the dark ages
said encounter was at a Gay bar
where gentlemen of like persuasion
were free to meet. From the moment
when I first saw my silver fox, I only
wanted to be with him. Twenty years
later the feeling is still mutual. Who
can explain kismet?! Love is love.
Today we both celebrate the best
thing that ever happened to us. And
only hope that everyone can be as
happy as we are. Ain't love grand?

Past imperfect
Let's be clear - it hasn't been easy. We
both entered into this partnership with
quite a bit of baggage. Everyone has a
history and must leverage their lessons
learned. Over the last twenty years our
separate pasts have made us appreciate
our collective present. Hence while we
occasionally wonder what our lives
might have been like if we'd met much
earlier - chances are we might not have
been in the right place at the right time.
All that I know is that Frank loves me
for who I am. Who could ask for more?

Funny, isn't it?
Looking back, it's amazing how much
our world has changed since we first
met. Coming out in my mid thirties
was both exhilarating and debilitating.
Finally embracing who I was meant
accepting that I was an anomaly -
a freak of nature. With that realization
came the truth that within our isolated
"community" and the world at large -
maintaining a of long term relationship
was more than challenging. Hence for
many years our love was somewhat of
a treasured secret. And in fact - illegal.

Through the glass darkly
Upon reflection I can't help but think
that I came out of the closet at exactly
the right time. For most of my peers,
growing up a mid century gay wasn't
necessarily the best of experiences.
Not only did society consider them
pariahs - their families preferred to
pretend that were not any different.
Finally a few brave queers stepped
forward and lived out in the open.
And slowly "normal" people started
to realize that the difference between
them and us was only who we loved.

Time ill spent
One can't help but marvel at the wave
of GLBT acceptance that has flowed
over our society. Within a very few
years public opinion shifted in support
of equality. That's because everyone
has always known or loved someone
who was gay. The difference is that
now they admit it. While a minority,
each and every homosexual impacts
a larger circle of heterosexuals. Sadly
it took until now for the majority to
figure out that our abnormality was
normal. And nobody could catch it.

Right or wrong
Recently the religious right has started
to attribute our collective support of
equality to a subversive hidden agenda
driven by a "gay mafia." Apparently
our battle for equality is a purposeful
attack on their religious freedom. What
could be farther from the truth? We all
have the right to believe whatever we
choose to believe. However no one
has the right to punish another for who
they naturally are. Rather than point
fingers, wouldn't a hand outreached in
friendship take us all to a better place?

Party boys
Like it or not - I love another man. And
like it or not - we're not going anywhere.
After twenty years our love has created
a bond that is strong enough to survive
against all odds. We're not asking anyone
to bless our union. All that we ask is that
you let us live equally in peace. The good
news is that most of our fellow Americans
and the world agree. Who could have ever
imagined that twenty years after our first
date, our world would be such a different
and better place. Now... isn't that a reason
to celebrate?! Here's to the next twenty!

We're NOT going there...

This takes the cake
I am if nothing else an optimist. Whereas
some see their glass as half empty - mine
is always half full. Therefore it's within
my nature to share and share alike. I feel
it's my duty to do unto others as I would
want them to do unto me. I consider this
my investment in OUR future. By giving
now, hopefully some stranger will help
me if or when I need it. Hence every tip,
check, or favor I hand out is a deposit
into my charitable hedge fund. In theory
we all benefit. Yet why do some assume
they can have their cake by eating mine?

Circle jerk
Even optimists lose their patience.
In truth, some people don't really
want to be helped. They will take
whatever you're willing to give.
Yet most "donations" seem to only
defer the inevitable. It's been said
that when one door closes, another
opens. However you have to answer
when reality comes a knocking. Sadly
many seemingly smart people either
ignore the facts or prefer to embrace
fantasy. Are they scared, confused,
or simply completely delusional?

Obstacle course
Some of us learn the hard way. But
when it's finally over... it's over. Once
one has nothing left to lose, they have
everything to gain. I can honestly say
that because I've been there and done
that. After hitting rock bottom, I had
to regain my equilibrium. However
along with losing almost all of my
"baggage" I eliminated the majority
of pressure, stress, and terror required
to simply hold on. While I had help
along the way, I had to do it myself.
That's the only way most of us learn.

Self medication
Hosting one's personal pity party is not
a viable long term strategy. They say
"misery loves company" however most
drama queens prefer to perform solo.
Have they figured out that playing the
role of victim defers having to assume
responsibility? Post repeated attempts
to help - smart friends and family may
stop offering assistance. When every
one is against you, suddenly one has
the perfect excuse for doing nothing.
Said persecution complex may just
be a warped form of self preservation.

Good intentions aside
While some thrive on failure, many enjoy
trying to fix other people's problems. I've
learned that doing unto others only works
when you don't do it for them. In order to
get from here to there, one must learn to
self navigate. There are no free rides and
external assistance doesn't benefit anyone
especially the passenger. What's mine is
mine and what's yours should be yours.
One must earn their keep otherwise they
won't appreciate it. Hence in the end the
only person you have a responsibility to
help you is yourself. That's a win/win!

Free fall
I do believe that the "haves" have a
responsibility to give some of it back.
That said, I don't embrace the idea
that anybody should assume that
they will be rescued. My destiny
is just that - mine. Right or wrong,
I bear the responsibility for MY
mistakes. Safety nets are short term
solutions. Emergency aid for crisis.
Rarely does a jolt of help solve the
problem. If the patient is still in a
coma, someone must turn off the
switch and pray for a MIRACLE!

Wrong number?
Republican or Democrat, tea or coffee,
liberal or conservative, right or left -
we have to do something - anything.
Most seem unwilling to face reality
and prefer to blame everyone else for
the mess we're in. Deferring what is
inevitable only makes judgement day
all the more painful. Sooner or later
something has to give. And honestly
who wants to swim upstream against
a tsunami of failed good intentions?
Isn't it's time to answer the wake up
call? If you snooze... we all lose!

URGE TO PURGE

Show and sell
It was only a matter of time before
my addiction to china and tidbits
would catch up with me. Being an
uber consumer creates a situation
that must be likened to a Hoarders
episode. Like it or not I've got too
much of too many good things. So
it's time to do something about it -
whether I like it or not. After all it's
not doing anybody any good sitting
there. Thus it's time to share the love
via e-Bay. And what better way to
rid one ills that foist them on you?

Parting is such sweet sorrow
While I've bought more than my share
via e-Bay, I'd never sold before. "T" is
a seasoned pro at digital commerce. At
my request she gave me a quick E-bay
tutorial. Before I knew it, an item was
up and selling! It's a bit sad to see one's
loved ones up on the block. However
while I adore each and every item, it's
time to set them free. Consider said act
of expulsion as my attempt to make the
world a more beautiful place. This Miss
Havisham is now officially a shop girl.
And in a way I'm selling my guts out!

Out of the box thinking 
At some point in life one must pack it
in. The next step is selling your debris
and shipping it. After moving multiple
times, we've got plenty of bubble wrap
and  "peanuts" to pack it ALL. Per "T"
the deep secret is double boxing. Thus
I intend to double the pleasure of my
customers by making sure everything
arrives in perfect condition. In a way
this is the final step in truly letting go.
Plus more of an opportunity to have
cute UPS guys in shorts knocking at
my door. Talk about special delivery!

Want a piece of me?
The sin of it all is that the more one
acquires - the more likely that most
of one's ill gotten gain will never see
the light of day. By releasing some of
my treasures from their imprisonment
I hope to find redemption in helping
others redecorate. The following are
a few goodies to go accompanied by
their stories. While beloved, it's much
better that someone else now gets to
enjoy them. I'm spreading the love...
and will continue to do so until every
last bit of buried treasure is GONE!

Go with the flow
Most of my life Ethel
displayed this antique
"Flow Blue" pitcher.
Her grandmother kept
it full with milk. While
very pretty, it's even a
bit too girly for me. So
it's going out to pasture.
Don't utter a word but
you can milk this one
time opportunity to own
a piece of Ethel Blue.
Click here for eBay!

A bit of the bubbly
Years ago I bagged these
seven hand blown goblets
at Neiman Marcus. A rise
above the rest, they work
exceptionally well with
other glasses. At over nine
inches they are definitely
a tall drink of water! As
important, they hold more
their fair share of vino! I'll
drink to that! So be of good
cheer and let's drink up and
link up with this listing!

Bowled over
Sadly even with all of
my dishes, some never
seem to make it to the
table. These charming
J&G Meakin ironstone
cereal "coupes" are not
only pretty but practical.
While they'll add a touch
of green to your table, it
won't take but a bit of
your hard earned green
stuff to take them home.
Grab them here at eBay. 

Glass act
Many years ago I purchased these
Cristal D'Arques goblets for my
mother at a local department store.
Given I spent all of my cash earned
on a paper route, I obviously must
have thought they were fabulous.
Since Ethel's departure, they've sat
for several years on the shelf. So
while I love them and all of their
memories, it's time for somebody
else to actually use them. Ready,
set, buy them on eBay here!

Who doesn't love a sausage?

The missing link
Double entendres aside, there's
nothing as good as a big, juicy
sausage. Given yesterday was
the kickoff of the grilling season,
I had several! In theory peasant
fare, said amalgam of ground
meat, fat, and seasonings is one
of my favorite foods. First of all
because they're so tasty. Equally
due to the fact they're so easy.
Finally if I must put something
that large and long in my mouth
it had better extremely satisfying!

Bump and grind
Many of my lady friends seen to have
an aversion for sausage. Part of their
issues seem to be the fact that nobody
quite knows what goes into the stuff
that fills said casings. Frank's nephew
"J" has been making sausages, salami's,
and other varieties for years. Far better
than anything that anyone can purchase
commercially, I'll admit that it's better
that we don't know what they're made
off. That said - anything that tastes that
good can't be bad for you... can it?! Or
should mystery meat be off the menu?

It could be wurst
With a few exceptions, I rarely ate
sausage growing up. New Yorkers,
my parents enjoyed hot dogs. The
precursors to "fast food" they were
sold on almost every street corner
in Manhattan. Many a hot summer
night Mother would opt to let our
local delicatessen do the cooking.
Hence we would dine on gigantic
Knackwurst. Basically hot dogs on
crack, they were beyond delicious!
Plus some slaw and a heaping side
of potato salad of course...

Where's the beef?
We all grew up hearing horrific tales
of rats falling into the hot dog factory
machinery. Fact or fiction, I've always
been careful about who's wiener I put
in my mouth. Long before "organic" -
we only ate 100% beef Kosher dogs.
Given some Rabbi had blessed said
mess, it had to be pure. Upon moving
to Chicago I tried to embrace their
native approach. Pickles and celery
salt aside, I still preferred only catsup.
After all, why ruin a perfectly good
SCHWEDDY WIENER?!

Local color
My ex wife's late Uncle Jon was the
first to let me gnaw on his Italian
sausage (and peppers). Since then
wherever we've lived my challenge
has been to find the best locally made
Italian variety. I'll admit that at times
it's been rather hard. However there
is a big difference and ultimately
love triumphs. Our favorite pasta
dish includes ground sausage Italiano,
chopped kale, minced onion, lots of
olive oil, and toasted pine nuts. All
sprinkled with Parmesan! MANGIA!

Czech it out
I couldn't imagine a better partner
given Frank's lineage has close ties
to sausage. His Mother is Italian
whereas his Dad is Czech. Living
in Chicago, we often journeyed far
far south to Berwyn where there
was a large Czech community.
There we would purchase and ship
sausages a la the homeland back to
Montana. However nothing was as
good as nibbling on a fresh sausage
in the car on the way home. Talk
about a taste of Chicago!

Puff, puff
Living in Columbus Ohio one of
our favorite haunts was Schmidt's
Sausage Haus. It's vast sausage
buffet was heaven on earth. Filled
with many encased varieties, there
was also mounds of sauerkraut, red
cabbage, spaetzel, and the like. Yet
there was one stuffed goodie that
I truly adored. Their GIGANTIC
cream puffs filled with what can
only be described as satisfaction.
Sadly, even after I'd had my full at
Schmidt's - I still hated Columbus!

Gone to the dogs
Some of us are simply old fashioned.
For many reasons I'll never embrace
any of those nouveau chicken types.
In my opinion, the only apple that
should be allowed near a sausage is
apple sauce. Like most food fads,
I'm confident that turkey and tofu
dogs will be passe' gone before I'm
finished. Ultimately what's old is
new. That must be why even today
I still adore "tube steak" fried in
butter. What better proof that you
can't teach an old dog new tricks!

LILAC TIME

Rest In Peace.

Once again we celebrate Memorial Day.

For those of you who are not Americans,

this special holiday is in honor of those we have

loved and lost.

Every year Frank's parents

place a bouquet of lilacs

upon the graves of those not forgotten.

A fragrant but fleeting tribute.

HAPPY MEMORIAL DAY.